Moving countries and trying to find my way.
As you know, just over a month ago, we moved to a little town in the south island of New Zealand called Fairlie, population 800. My husband and I are both from small farming towns in South Australia, so that part doesn’t phase us at all; what does phase me is that I’m 55 with no friends here and no school kids to make the school/parent connections and neither of us in paid employment here so no work connections to broaden our horizons and meet people. It means we simply have to get creative and actively seek ways to meet people and that is just what we have done. We started with one small step, and it has beautifully snowballed from there.
As mentioned, we are both from small country towns originally so we know that small towns revolve around a few key institutions, mainly church, sport and pubs so that is where we have started…and we have been so rewarded.
On our first weekend, we attended mass at St Patrick’s Church, the most gorgeous ‘wee’ Catholic church (Kiwi lingo slipping in already), literally a 3-minute walk from The Courthouse. It suddenly felt very familiar with the locals reminding us of the locals in our hometown parishes. Mass was followed by a morning tea outside where we introduced ourselves around. The first couple we met asked us the same questions everybody seems to be asking and that is ‘why Fairlie?’ That’s an easy one, and I tell them of my time here on exchange in my late teens. Then the conversation immediately, inevitably turned to sports ‘do you play golf?’ I meekly said I played, again as a teenager, and by late that afternoon a set of golf sticks were delivered to the Courthouse notifying me that I will be playing mixed twilight golf that coming Wednesday.
I’ve been playing twilight golf now for four weeks and have met so many lovely people; locals now say hi in the street, we’ve been asked to dinner, I’ve been asked to help at a golf club function, I’ve joined the club and am now playing Ladies golf on Tuesdays. From that first hello at mass, I’ve been invited to join a Thursday hiking group and a gardening club, to which I’ve wisely declined. Gardening isn’t my thing just yet.
While I know we will never be considered as locals, and we totally get that, we have been so warmly welcomed by so many and so many varied age groups. I’ll never forget the kindness of our immediate neighbours, flowers, food and handy general information given to us. I’m grateful we are a part of the St Patrick’s parish, from catching up with the parish priest at the local bakery, hearing past stories of The Courthouse from parishioners, it’s a beautiful community that has warmly welcomed us to Fairlie.
Small towns can be tricky to find your way and meet people but putting ourselves out there has certainly helped; just last night playing twilight golf with seven men, total strangers to me, to this morning hiking with eight women, again total strangers to me, I find myself asking myself, “who even am I?’ ‘ how did I get here?’ and’ Why am I doing this to myself?…. I’m not sure how to answer this, but I do know its never too late to meet new people and maybe find a new tribe in a new country, it’s an adventure and we are loving the whole process! So far!
Moving countries and trying to find my way.
As you know, just over a month ago, we moved to a little town in the south island of New Zealand called Fairlie, population 800. My husband and I are both from small farming towns in South Australia, so that part doesn’t phase us at all; what does phase me is that I’m 55 with no friends here and no school kids to make the school/parent connections and neither of us in paid employment here so no work connections to broaden our horizons and meet people. It means we simply have to get creative and actively seek ways to meet people and that is just what we have done. We started with one small step, and it has beautifully snowballed from there.
As mentioned, we are both from small country towns originally so we know that small towns revolve around a few key institutions, mainly church, sport and pubs so that is where we have started…and
we have been so rewarded.
On our first weekend, we attended mass at St Patrick’s Church, the most gorgeous ‘wee’ Catholic church (Kiwi lingo slipping in already), literally a 3-minute walk from The Courthouse. It suddenly felt very familiar with the locals reminding us of the locals in our hometown parishes. Mass was followed by a morning tea outside where we introduced ourselves around. The first couple we met asked us the same questions everybody seems to be asking and that is ‘why Fairlie?’ That’s an easy one, and I
tell them of my time here on exchange in my late teens. Then the conversation immediately, inevitably turned to sports ‘do you play
golf?’ I meekly said I played, again as a teenager, and by late that afternoon a set of golf sticks were delivered to the Courthouse notifying me that I will be playing mixed twilight golf that coming Wednesday.
I’ve been playing twilight golf now for four weeks and have met so many lovely people; locals now say hi in the street, we’ve been asked to dinner, I’ve been asked to help at a golf club function, I’ve joined the club and am now playing Ladies golf on Tuesdays. From that first hello at mass, I’ve been invited to join a Thursday hiking group and a gardening club, to which I’ve wisely declined. Gardening isn’t my thing just yet.
While I know we will never be considered as locals, and we totally get that, we have been so warmly welcomed by so many and so many varied age groups. I’ll never forget the kindness of our immediate neighbours, flowers, food and handy general information given to us. I’m grateful we are a part of the St Patrick’s parish, from catching up with the parish priest at the local bakery, hearing past stories of The Courthouse from parishioners, it’s a beautiful community that has warmly welcomed us to Fairlie.
Small towns can be tricky to find your way and meet people but putting ourselves out there has certainly helped; just last night playing twilight golf with seven men, total strangers to me, to this morning hiking with eight women, again total strangers to me, I find myself asking myself, “who even am I?’ ‘ how did I get here?’ and’ Why am I doing this to myself?…. I’m not sure how to answer this, but I do know its never too late to meet new people and maybe find a new tribe in a new country, it’s an adventure and we are loving the whole process! So far!
So love following you and Matt’s journey Sarah. Great idea having a blog that all can follow. Has Matt found a men’s group to have a beer with ???? xxx
I’m in awe of your boldness and bravery, Sarah. I’m following your journey with fascination.
Love it! It’s surprising where you find new tribes isn’t it. I found an amazing one at Bible Studies in Memphis – something I would never have seen myself doing. With your network and personality, I have no doubt you’ll continue making new friends, and learn so much about yourself! Xx
Looking good Sarah. Oh to be 55 again. A cottage in Ireland to come and go would suit me. Regular visits is second best.
Love this Sarah 🙂
Love this for you Sarah. Fairlie sounds wonderful and I hope the locals realise what a gem they have in you!
you go girl!!!! Much love to you both from the Fitzy family xxx